Well, here we are. 5 months now I've been Commander of this wonderful department full of bright faces and charming individuals. At first it was a pleasure to serve these fine ladies and gentlemen and to help them develop into proper SRT units. I've been apart of the SRT Community on and off for almost 2 years now, as I made my debut August 4th 2018 as a Cadet. I've seen SRT at it's best, and at it's worst. I've seen the community go from its best and back down to its worse more times than I can count. I've watched many fine people mature and develop over the years, seeing as how they changed into men and women. It's been a long, bumpy ride since then with many ups and downs, but at this point in my life it's all too much for me to handle. For many reasons which I shall go into detail below, I cannot for my sake remain as Commander of SRT.
For starters, I simply don't have the time anymore. My life is advancing so quickly that I'm struggling to keep up with all of my responsibilities. For those of you that don't know, my aspiration is to become a pilot in the Air Force, meaning I'm striving for an acceptance into the United States Air Force Academy to make that happen. It's a rigorous process that has begun this month, and it requires me to maintain my 4.075 GPA, my position in 3 National Clubs (being National Honors, National Tech Honors, and National Beta Club. Not only that, but I'm working on my responsibilities in a Navy JROTC unit as a Supply Officer for an entire Platoon. On top of it all, my family is preparing for another move right before my Senior year of Highschool. All things considered, I'm lucky if I come home, do all of my after-school responsibilities, and have 2 hours left to play, typically not spent on GMod.
Secondly, this is gonna be the longest paragraph, I just have no drive to play the game anymore. As I said I've been apart of SRT for almost 2 years, and I joined the community back in July of last year. In that short amount of time I managed to stock up 1644 hours on this one server alone. When you're apart of something for so long, and it doesn't necessarily change all that much it starts to get a tad bit boring. Before you ask for me to just "Take and LOA and see how you feel," I've been there and I've done that on multiple occasions to no avail. Now here's where I might get myself in trouble for stating what I believe to be self-evident. This server, is not even close to what it once was. It's not as well regarded, it's not as enjoyable as it used to be. As I said, I've been here on and off for almost 2 years, and never before have I felt so out of place and so discouraged to be apart of something. Ever since I achieved a High Command rank in SRT I've made it my sole goal to better the department sure, but to always keep the server in mind with every decision I've ever made. Every nerf I've forcefully put onto SRT, every family blacklist, every removal of an individual, everything that I've done in this department has been with the ideas of balance and care for the server in mind. And yet, I'm here today and I feel as if I haven't done a single god damn thing. I feel as if my position, even though I worked for it, means absolutely nothing. Trying to put my word out there for the benefit of the community has almost always been met with a shunned face, and as time goes on, those faces that once shunned me found that I was right in what I said. (Here's where I REALLY might get myself in trouble). For example, Delta Squad. Before you kill me, I'm not so much going to go on the people within the department, but what it represents as a whole. When I heard of the idea that DS was going to come to be, it made me personally furious because I remembered what happened in the server's past with the addition of ARU. For those of you that don't know, let me give you a little history lesson. When ARU was added, the entire server went at each other's throats. CERT was removed for an entire week without warning to make way for this new Department, and was only added back because the feedback from such a removal of a time-proven department was extremely negative. Not only that, but SRT was shrunken to a 7 man sub-division, and saw no further growth what so ever from that point on. Hell, even SWAT was almost effected. All of SWAT's High Command, and all of its members were going to be straight up removed with no compensation what so ever, and the members of SRT were going to take over everything, and create and entirely new SWAT. But, as SRT High Command, me, Jeffe, and Will decided for the benefit of the server we'd neuter ourselves and fuck over a lot less people. You can see now why I was anxious to see ANOTHER Tactical unit being added. I told those with the idea I wouldn't stop them if they went through with it, as I knew I'd have no power in that regard, but I warned them what would happen, and so far I've been right. I told them they'd receive heavy backlash, I told them it'd halt progress for other departments, I told them it would take ages for everything to stabilize again just as how ARU had done. Every single thing I warned about came to fruition. Not only that, but I had to ask myself, what does this represent as a whole? A department was added with money, and had non-SMT members immediately take place of a High Command position whether they had ever been High Command or not, which brings me to my next set of points.
This server, as stated is not what it used to be. A year ago I would log on to see at least 90 people on daily. We're lucky if we hit 60 today, and I feel that's because of the way the server is not only being run, but being treated. It's not changing in the slightest, and it's a fault on both fronts. I have to ask a lot of you, why are you so damn negative all the time? I see beautiful suggestions being put into the suggestion box every single day that would give the Community what it has been asking for, for MONTHS, and yet all I see is "-Support: MAY cause lag, -Support: MAY cause lag" and it drives me absolutely crazy. Why would you all discourage new things on the basis that it "MIGHT" cause lag instead of seeing for yourself first hand how the server would react to such an addon? And the Management, I know a lot of you can see the benefit in such suggestions, and yet they're denied regardless! You all cry for something new but when that something is staring you in the face you treat it like a man treated a women who knows Science back in the 17th century, like it's witchcraft!
Finally, I want to address how this position, Commander, is not close to what I thought it would be. It started off as a nice position that I thoroughly enjoyed doing, but over time it became a part-time job with absolutely no benefits what so ever, except for the fact that I could now see clearly all that's wrong with this server. You're not treated like a Commander when you earn this position. You're not treated like a respected member of this community, in fact it's quite the opposite. Every single update you push out is regarded with negativity not only from the community, but from your own members. There's always something to complain about. Every time you try and do something new for your department, may it be a job that was 2 years in the making, it's shut down because a select few paid enough money to make that job a, "bad idea." As much as I'd like to go into detail on that, I can't for this posts sake, wouldn't want it getting deleted after all. But this position... has no benefits. I can't move forward in the ranks, I can't create new jobs for my department less I just waste my very limited free time on something that'll ultimately be denied, and I can't push my department into a position where I feel like it'll be stable, and enjoyable for all of my members. All I can do now, and I'll I can hope that I have accomplished is prepare my members for the future, prepare them to be able to do what I could not. As of right now though, I can't mentally handle being in this position anymore, it's deteriorating, and makes me want to ball my fucking eyes out just because of how frustrating and tedious it is! And I KNOW I'm not the only one who feels this way either. I'm just the first to give in and step down because I'm sick and tired of watching corruption happen within the server, I'm tired of being treated as if my position means absolutely nothing even if I EARNED it, I'm tired of watching the negativity grow, and I'm tired of watching my power as a Commander be stripped away from me because I "MIGHT GO ROGUE", it's INSULTING! It's not healthy for me or anyone! For all this and much, MUCH more, I can't remain Commander and be happy any longer.
Finally, some mentions. @[GL] Mikey Took me forever to find your name because you put a [GL] tag on a GAMINGLIGHT forums page.. but uuuh, hey man. I wish you the best of luck. I wouldn't have put you in your current position if I thought you couldn't handle it. Feel free to ask me any questions at any time and I'll be glad to help you. Other than that, I'd just like to say that I'm proud of you, and I thank you for letting me resign knowing that SRT is going to be in good hands. I've enjoyed your company in the dept. and as a family leader. Your humor, your caring nature, and your willingness to get shit done never ceases to amaze me, I know you'll do a fantastic job man. @Matthew I'm gonna be honest, recently you've kind of pissed me off, but I'd be worried if you didn't! No friendship is perfect, and I never would ask ours to be perfect. But that's the reason ours will last! If you can get over the troubles and differences, it paves the way for a friendship in which you can both feel happy with, and I can safely say that's the case here. I'm more than proud of you and your accomplishments in PD and the Staff team, and I'm thankful you gave me this opportunity as SRT Commander, even if I did kind of yoink the position away from others.
Now to ping some others >:D @Freeze Never stop starting Minge hour cause it's honestly some of the most fun I've ever had! On a more serious note, you're a fantastic Commander, better than I could ever achieve and I'm so thankful I had the opportunity to work with you. @Ronin Will you fill that second Commander spot already? It's gotta happen eventually, cause you're deserving for everything including you overwhelming amount of care and support. Really though, those bears are adorable, never stop sending them. @Yobo Commander of a cursed Department, and yet you've seemed to make it work. I'm hella proud of you Yobo! #LongestRunningColonel? @ExoTic Maddog "Hey, Hey Blitzton, Blitz, guess what? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" @Jimmy James Your ARK server may have been bad, but your friendship definitely hasn't been Thank you for being one to speak your mind when you felt appropriate, and thank you for all the times we just hung out. @EternityAgar I wish we had the opportunity to work with each other more before I resigned, cause you're a very respectful and funny guy. Good luck with all of your future endevours as ARU Commander! @Hunt BARK BARK BARK BARK! You'll always be my favorite K-9, and one of my fondest friends
@Ecott / @Calamity I honestly don't know what to say you two. There was a time when I could call both of you friends, and then a time where I'm sure you both hated my guts. Regardless, for better or for worse you two become High Command and stuck through all of the negative criticism not only from myself, but from others. I gotta say, I'm kind of impressed in that regard. @Voxis Keep in touch with me man, you've always been anotha brotha to me... you simp (That's a joke don't Dox me please...) @Hannah King You already know I'm gonna say keep in touch over Discord too, only difference is you won't get to stab me in-game as much! @Rocco_Rex TACTICAL SHORTS REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
@cammy1706 SCOTTTTLAAAAAAAAAAAND FOREEEEEEEEEVEEEEEEEEEEEER To all of my SRT members, never stop trying to make not only this community, but the world as a whole a better place. I'm going to miss each and every single one of you, and I hope you all can understand why I have to do this for the sake of my mental health and sanity. I'm hoping that I've adequately prepared all of you, including MiKeY for the future, and I have no doubt you'll all do a wonderful job. I wish you all the best in your futures, and to those who haven't already I hope you realize that there's more to life than a Garry's Mod server. Take care guys! If any of you have any questions, feel free to PM me as I can be more open there than I can here.
This is 1K67 going 10-7 for the last time. Goodnight Gaminglight.