I disappear Posted December 7, 2020 Share Posted December 7, 2020 (edited) Welp....... I said I would not do this AGAIN but here I am. The last couple of times I have resigned were out of anger and not thought. So naturally when I hot over my anger I came back. This time it is because I actually quit. 1st reason: This game is no longer fun for me. It feels like a job. I do not have fun. The purpose of a game is for it to be fun. What is the point of a video game if it is not fun? 2nd reason: School wears me down. I am passing school and everything but everyday after school I get physically tired and want to take a nap. 3rd reason: After school activities. I am in my schools robotics team. They need me. It is also enjoyable and I love programming. 4th reason: Family. Whenever I am on the server I just do not spend enough time with my family. I do not go shopping with them or anything because of me just being constantly on the server. 5th reason: What is the point? If I kept going and eventually got O5 what is the point? What do I get out of it besides some virtual power? I guess I would make some friends but are they truly your friends? Do they just want to be your friend because they are high up? Why should I try and continue? 6th reason: Expectations. The expectations are too high. They expect you to be on everyday of your life. I just can not. I have a life that I like living. 7th reason: I need to spend time with my friends. I neglect them. I choose the server over them I am a bad friend. 8th reason: I plan on getting a job soon. Once I get a job I will have nowhere near enough time for this. The real reason I took my LOA was this. Contemplating this. I thought over this for 5 days. Now.... Here is Somewhere I belong by Linkin Park When this began, I had nothing to say And I'd get lost in the nothingness inside of me (I was confused) And I let it all out to find that I'm not the only person with these things in mind (inside of me) But all the vacancy the words revealed Is the only real thing that I got left to feel (nothing to lose) Just stuck, hollow and alone And the fault is my own, And the fault is my own I want to heal, I want to feel, What I thought was never real I want to let go of the pain I felt so long (erase all the pain 'til it's gone) I want to heal, I want to feel Like I'm close to something real I want to find something I've wanted all along Somewhere I belong And I've got nothing to say I can't believe I didn't fall right down on my face (I was confused) Looking everywhere only to find that it's not the way I had imagined it all in my mind (so what am I?) What do I have but negativity? 'Cause I can't justify the way everyone is looking at me (nothing to lose) Nothing to gain, hollow and alone And the fault is my own, And the fault is my own I want to heal, I want to feel, What I thought was never real I want to let go of the pain I've held so long (erase all the pain 'till it's gone) I want to heal, I want to feel Like I'm close to something real I want to find something I've wanted all along Somewhere I belong I will never know myself until I do this on my own And I will never feel, Anything else until my wounds are healed I will never be Anything 'til I break away from me And I will break away, and find myself today I want to heal, I want to feel What I thought was never real I want to let go of the pain I felt so long (erase all the pain til it's gone) I want to heal, I want to feel, Like I'm close to something real I want to find something I've wanted all along Somewhere I belong I want to heal I want to feel like I'm, Somewhere I belong, I want to heal I want to feel like I'm somewhere I belong Somewhere I belong AND I do not want reserves. I will not come back. Edited December 7, 2020 by Gordan 4 'Cause you can't feel my anger You can't feel my pain You can't feel my torment Driving me insane Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
General bacon Posted December 7, 2020 Share Posted December 7, 2020 Have a good one lad Retired MTF Nu7 LTCOL| Retired Nu7 HFTO | Retired OH1 | Retired Admin | French Canadian ManCustom Classes: Raptor Team | Jeff the killer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pills Posted December 7, 2020 Share Posted December 7, 2020 NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WHYYYYYYYY T-T Sadge moments hope you had fun! Former: 𝐒𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐃𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐨𝐫 - 𝐒𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐀𝐝𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WantedIdeas Posted December 7, 2020 Share Posted December 7, 2020 F Admin For SCPRP , Vice Commander In Nu-7. Former Major/Head FTO In Omicron-9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flixy Posted December 7, 2020 Share Posted December 7, 2020 Huh, who again. jk DON'T LET ME GOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOO... COME BACK NOWWWWWWW. I NEEED YOU NOWWWWWWWWWWWWW Nu7 MSGT | Ex CI R&D AIN | Ex Sec 2LT | Ex OS | Ex CI 2LT [CC] Owns: OPIF - Omnipurpose Infantry Force | Charple on Vacation | Vonzen Plushi | CI Take Force 'Blackhawks' [CC] On: Farmer Jakub | MTF Sigma-66 | E-11 Rangers 'Reborn' | TF2 Solider | CI TF2 Heavy | Obama | Lone Wolf | Combine | STARS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sixx Posted December 8, 2020 Share Posted December 8, 2020 We didn't talk much but whenever I was around you, you were a funny dude. Have a good one man. [ SCP RP ] Director of Research & Security || Armored Shield Award Winner || First Head Warden & HOPO || Security Artillery Unit || D-7025 || D-Class High Council || Former Head of Security || Former Admin || Former Event Team Member Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mind Stone Posted December 8, 2020 Share Posted December 8, 2020 F Retired LCZ Manager : Pingas Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OWNED Posted December 8, 2020 Share Posted December 8, 2020 I just remember you as the guy always on the gordan freeman researcher model you're chill stay frosty~ Former E11 1LT/Head Ranger, Former Event Team/Staff Member| GENSEC SGT Foundation Chef <- me when the quiet guy in D-block begins to reach into his pocket Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jack (utility one) Posted December 11, 2020 Share Posted December 11, 2020 Damn gordan this is like the 500th time I've seen this and it doesn't get any better ;-; There are gods in Alabama: Jack Daniel's, high school quarterbacks, trucks, big tits, and also Jesus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J0LT Posted December 11, 2020 Share Posted December 11, 2020 crying Retired Nu7 CMDR & CI LTCOL/MAJ Senior Admin/Forums dip/Support Supervisor | former the following: HTF/E4 Head | Only Anubis award winner | Former Nu7 HFTO and CI OFTO | Sec MSGT+Pertinax Owns: Omi-9 'Last Remnants' | Farmer Tucker | Farmer Darius XII | Reznov Klushie | Foxx On: Alpha-8 | S.T.A.R.S | Iota-13 'Luxxy's Soldiers' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CanOBeanz Posted December 14, 2020 Share Posted December 14, 2020 Dang Gordon, sad to see you go. You've been around for quite awhile, and I liked working alongside ya in utility! Wish you the best in all of your upcoming adventures in life. Come back and visit us someday, yeah? O5-9: "Misfortune" A.K.A. "Mr. Unlucky" "Accidents Happen-- Mostly to me!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[GL] Dtscalice Posted December 21, 2020 Share Posted December 21, 2020 Gordan imma miss u tho *Steals your Potatoes* I hope one day you come and visit! ~FWS Price Truth is just a matter of perspective. The duty of every soldier is to protect the innocent ~Captain Price (Modern Warfare 2) Former CMD Positions: E11 1LT, Medical Chief Manager, CI LT and SRIC, Alpha 1 CPL, RRH Squad Lead. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mary Posted December 24, 2020 Share Posted December 24, 2020 On 12/7/2020 at 5:09 PM, WantedIdeas said: F Free From GL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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