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The 3 hostages incident [EOI GRADE]


Bossatron1924

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Former EOI comments:

Banana fridge.

 But seriously, I will give some pointers. 
here we go:

1) try to get more info on what each of these sub units do for Nu7, ask what the purpose of CA or FE is.

2) Add methods of torture when they are used, just calling someone out is rather boring and bland, describe the torture method used and the hostages reaction to it.

3) change up the color scheme, the hostage name shouldn’t be the same as the text imo. Also you can put your name instead of researcher. 

overall this is a decent interrogation, there’s a lot that you missed on gaining however. Don’t be afraid to go in depth with your questions. If their good enough you can literally get the hostage to start reading off their SOP
 

RETIRED

SCP-RP:Delta-5 CPT | Deputy Head G9| Medical DHFW Doctor. | E11 1LT | Head Ranger | D4 Vanguard FF5 | RnD EOI V3 Canibal

ImperialRP: MC 1LT Bacon 3817 |  DT SGT FF5

 

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Efficiency: 20/25

Your questions managed to extract a lot of info in a short period of time, am quite impressed in that sense. While it ain't perfect; it did a solid job.

Insight:15/25

You had such a great start but you stopped way too early. I felt you could have gotten way more out of this as Buck said above. If you kept pushing for more info you probably could have gotten a treasure trove of information.

Presentation:10/25

Gonna be real here; if you are gunning for EOI then you should be making your own docs, not using the template. You got some extra points for updating it and changing a few things, but the colors felt confusing and out of place, the colors used should be mostly similar to each other unless you are trying to highlight something important.

Writing: 15/25

Writing didn't have any grammar errors and flowed reasonably smooth, felt you could have specified if torture was used at all to extract the information by putting something in the background saying something like *screams fill the room for several minutes*.

Overall Grade: 55/100

-L1 Heisenberg I

Edited by Cecil Stedmen

Former SCPRP: CI R&D Chief Director of Operations || Research Administrator || RFA Operations Advisory || RRH Analyst Xray 77 || CI General || Senior Event Team || CI Lieutenant Commander || Exemplary Investigator Award Recipient || STF D4 Poseidon PL7 || A1 SPC "Quantum"

Former ImperialRP: Naval Captain || Security Director || GM VI 

Former PoliceRP:  EMS Captain || RRU Rapid Response Team Manager || FBI Assistant Director 

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