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The Light

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  1. Also agree wit dis but would +Support a promo to RM
  2. My Resignation, it's been a long time coming, I'm surprised that I haven’t resigned after 3 weeks of me returning and immediately getting marked as Semi-Active, but I still kept going. I have no idea why I kept going, I think the motivation of just me helping was the main reason, but idk. On August 25 in 2019, I was a little baby Junior Researcher having fun roleplaying with everyone, my dream was to make it to Foundation Doctor at this time and my dream came true on December 17th of 2019. I kept going for months and a few months later there was a new position opened for High Command called Assistant Head of Research, I thought to myself “this is the time to really try my best to get this position”, but what I didn’t realize is how quick it would be to burn myself out after that month I went really inactive. Soviet has just got promoted to Foundation Doctor and I was still inactive because of my burnt out status. Then in a meeting there was an announcement… a new High Command member was announced for Research… It was Soviet… I was furious, my anger overpowered me more than anything. I fully convinced myself to resign because of someone else getting the position I attempted to work so hard for then got burnt out. Then on June 14, 2020 I posted it… My Resignation. People posted how they were gonna miss me, but at the time I was still furious so I looked past that. After that I started to play on FiveM on a whitelisted server and I was having the most fun I could have. The roleplay aspect of that was amazing. It was exactly what I was looking for. A few months passed and now the Server I was enjoying was dying because the owner and its own community was turning against each other. The server went from a high population to a low population the RP was at a low because of the low player count. I then decided to stop playing that and move on. I was so bored because I couldn’t think of any other games to play. I was an inch away from selling my computer and moving on with my life, I had then thought about Garry’s Mod again and decided “hey why don’t I check out the roster for the SCP-RP game I used to play”. I checked and saw that there were 3 people I knew and saw an opportunity to come back when the Research Manager position was open. I got reinstated and look back on my resignation post to the people that commented on it and read my old post and decided I needed to change something. I need to change something about what I should do differently so I could stay longer and be more useful. Then it clicked… I needed to stop worrying about ranks, stop worrying about trying my hardest, just enjoy and have fun on the server, and be more of a help and involved. I met lots of knew individuals that were great to hang around with that came and left. Most of the originals were gone, but talking to these new people and enjoying being around these guys, it didn’t seem like it was a problem. At this time I was enjoying the server and the RP was fine. As time went on I made it back to Foundation Doctor where I last was before I left. I was chilling there for some time not as long as before but for a little and was still helping still and not trying really hard or doing anything crazy. Then.. the unexpected happened D resigned which was lowkey sad cause I was starting to get to know more about D. Something came across my mind and It was something that happened last time. Moonrose made it to Foundation Doctor before I did and I thought to myself “do I break everything I've been saying and try my hardest to gamble DHOR for me to get burnt out again or just leave it”. I then told myself “it's a video game, you're a new man, a rank in a Garry’s Mod server isn’t the end of the world”. A few weeks passed and it’s a Friday and it’s the Command Meeting. In that meeting they had a promotion for High Command because they needed another one. Moonrose had been announced as the new DHOR for the first time. I wasn’t angry or upset, I was happy for her. Then in that moment I knew I had fixed my issue about worrying about something that isn’t real. Another few weeks passed and Tomato resigned out of the blue, everyone including me were shocked about his leave. He was one of the few people I’ve known back in 2019 to leave. A few days passed and some of the Command new when I got reinstated are no longer here which was also kind of a sad thing to happen, but as I like to say “we move”. In a command meeting not expecting anything the last announcement was Starstep’s but since he couldn’t make it Sparkle announced it. He said they have a promotion and it was “Light to Deputy Head of Research”. I was speechless, like literally speechless, didn’t you hear my speech? It was awesome. I was having the most fun I could possibly have during the 2 weeks I became High Command and possibly the most active I have been. Then something happened… Now it's either that I really burnt myself out in those 2 weeks or it was something else… I was losing motivation to get on the server. It wasn’t because of me forcing myself to get on the server when I didn’t need to it was more of. What is there to do on the server that makes a difference between High Command and Foundation Doctor. Like I know, I have more responsibilities than Foundation Doctor, but there's something missing that I didn’t think about, what would be the point of getting on the server as High Command if research is already in a state which once you make it to Foundation Doctor or anything else what CAN you do. Roleplaying would be a reliable option, but people don’t RP anymore, these days it’s all about SCP’s that are consistently trying to breach which makes the Foundation chaotic. Also I personally think that for Combative CMD/HCMD it would be easier because they have something to do every time, because these days combat is more fun than RP because barely people RP these days. I will not be shouting out individual people because I think that’s just cringe lmao and also u prob know if u one of the people of would've written about. JMT/SMT: Thank you ladies for working on this gud server. Everyone that met me: It was a fun ride but, its time to say goodbye, I will not take a spot up if I think I would be incapable doing my responsibilities, but hey maybe someone else takes over my position and does better then me also this was made in like 1 month advanced so like yea.... also this sounds cringe but fook it... too lazy to edit it.... also hoovy sucks at dbd and 1 last thing.... remember the O5 Council
  3. +Support less be honest research and rnd basically same thing except one is bad guy
  4. +Support this is prob one of the best admin ngl
  5. tbh how in the time span of 3 seconds how are they gonna kill em and not get suicide bombed ^
  6. I swear if I get told by another 912 to put away my knife I will RDM his ass next time
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